My Dad

It's no secret that my dad has had is fair share of health issues over the years.  The first one I can remember happened when I was eight.  My dad had an episode at home that resembled a heart attack.  A few months later...open heart surgery.

I was too young to understand all the details.  My dad was born with a bum aortic valve.  He has what's called Aortic Stenosis.  His first surgery was to replace his valve with a mechanical one. The surgery didn't go perfectly...he was bleeding internally, so they took him back in and re-cracked his chest.  After a week or so in ICU, he went to my grandma's house to recover.

I don't remember when he came home...or if he felt good or bad when he did.  I remember I stayed at Carol's house when my dad had his surgery...and I remember feeling so homesick.  I was too little to understand all of it, but I knew it wasn't good.

He's had his ups and downs since then.  He always beats the odds. He had his second heart surgery soon after marrying Carlys.  It couldn't be a routine operation...that would be too easy.  Nope.  He had an aneurism that had adhered to his sternum.  So when they cracked his chest...the aneurism ruptured.  No blood to the brain for many minutes.  The doctor prepared us for my dad to be brain dead.

Pretty sure he came out kicking even harder.  No brain damage. Well...none that we can attribute to the surgery.  Just kidding, Dad.

A few years after that, he had some other pretty serious health issues while I was in the academy.  I went to the hospital one time to visit him...as I walked down the hallway towards his room, I could hear him screaming in out in pain.  The nurses were helping my dad, but help was painful.  My dad is the toughest man I know...hearing how badly he hurt was torture.  If he hurt...it was possible anyone could hurt.

He had a scare with kidney cancer.  Chemo and radiation aren't options for my dad because of his heart issues.  Luckily, once his kidney was removed...so was the cancer.

He's had other issues I can't keep track of...like the issues with his nerves in his neck.  He had carpal tunnel surgery on both hands and had something done to the nerves in his elbows to help too.

My dad has always been invincible.  He beats everything...he's always around when you need him.  He'd do anything to help you...give the shirt off his back.  He's the most generous man I've ever met.  He wasn't the big teddy bear, cuddly, read stories at night dad when I was growing up, but he always came home.  He went to work every day.  He never hit us (unless we deserved it :) ).  He never drank or used drugs.  He took us to church every Sunday.  He loved my mom.  He was a good dad.

(With Sydney Marie)

As the years passed and he has gotten older and older...he's actually older.  It's funny to look back at how old I thought my parents were when I was little.  I mean they were OLD! Um...they were only a few years older than I am now.


Which is young.

I dread the day the inevitable happens.  I don't want to be an orphan.  I want my dad to live forever.  He's almost 70 and his mom is still alive, so I think I should get the same deal with at least one of my parents.

My twenties quickly passed as I watched my dad love his grandkids.  I watched all my nieces and nephews build meaningful relationships with Grumpaw.  I feared I wouldn't have a baby in time for my dad to know and love him on this Earth.  

Ugh...I made my dad promise he would stick around until I had a baby.  Then one night I realized that wasn't good enough.  So...I made my dad promise he would stick around for 15 years. He just shook his head at me.  I took that as a resounding yes!  When I got pregnant, I wanted to make sure my dad understood that the 15 years didn't start until I gave birth.  I got another head shake...and possibly an eye roll, but how could that not be an agreement?

The night I gave birth was full of so many emotions.  Watching my dad hold my tiny newborn baby boy was better than I imagined.  My heart was so full.  I longed for that moment.


Now I long for these moments...

I love seeing my dad interact with Blip.  He even still calls him Blip (and not just on-line like me).  He calls to check on us all the time.  I love watching my dad love him.  It's everything I wanted...but I want more.  I want my 15 years (and then another).  He did promise, after all.